3 Down; 159 To Go.

Apologies for co-opting a fairly hackneyed writing device, but let's play a little game of "Orioles: Looking Up, Looking Down?"!

LOOKING UP:

1. Daniel Cabrera. Forget the botched fielding play that cost him a run. Look at the stats: 7 innings; 9 strikeouts; 13/2 groundball/flyball ratio, which means that of the 15 batters who managed to put bat to ball, only two hit the ball in the air. The four walks are too many, but if he could duplicate this performance every time he takes the mound, the Orioles would win far more games than they lose.
   
   
2. Corey Patterson. He hit an RBI double off the best lefthander in the game, Johan Santana. I'm pretty sure I didn't hallucinate that (he even took a few pitches, too!). OK, so that's his only hit of the season so far, but if he can hit lefties at even a respectable level this year, he will have a huge offensive year. Also, he's still the best defensive centerfielder in baseball; he's hardly the first guy to lose a flyball in the Metrodome ceiling, and he won't be the last.
   
   
3. Aubrey Huff. As I mentioned the other day, he just looks like an Oriole. Right now, frankly, that could be construed as an insult, but I mean well. So far, he's hitting lefties and playing first base pretty well; much like Patterson, if he can keep that up all year, that will be one less worry for a team which has plenty already.

LOOKING DOWN:

1. Kevin Millar. When you're getting replaced by Chris Gomez in the third game of the season, you know that something is horribly wrong. Don't forget that, between Jay Payton, Jay Gibbons, Aubrey Huff and himself, Millar makes the least amount of money (and is only signed for one year). Something to keep in mind if there's a roster crunch later on...
   
   
2. The catching situation. Ramon Hernandez has a strained quad, so Paul Bako starts; Bako gets steamrolled by the 6'4", 223 lb. Justin Morneau, so Alberto Castillo is rolled off the Anonymous Hispanic Orioles Catcher assembly line.
   
   OK, couple things:
   
   a.) Who the hell is Alberto Castillo?
   b.) Which coach's wife did J.R. House sleep with during Spring Training?
   c.) Who Farted? (Oh, it was the nurse. Didn't see that one coming!)
   
   I refuse to believe that Bako and Castillo are better backups to Ramon than House, a great-hitting catcher in AAA who, sadly, can't throw very well after numerous shoulder and arm surgeries. Who cares? Just tell him to put it in his pocket when someone tries to steal. At least he can hit.
   
   And don't even get me started on Freddie Bynum vs. Jon Knott. This team's roster decisions are absolutely maddening. I fully expect Perlozzo to cost us 5-10 games from poor in-game managing alone; if he keeps Bynum and Bako on his bench all year, it could be 10-15. Bynum pinch-hit for both Castillo and Bako against Joe Nathan this week, and looked like a Little Leaguer in both at-bats.
   
   Could we PLEASE get some hitters on this bench?!
   
   
3. Jaret Wright. Marianne calls him "a cross between the Pillsbury Dough Boy and Jason Giambi". High praise, indeed. The countdown to the Third Hayden Penn Era has begun.
   
   (Also, um, ESPN? Pretty sure this is the picture you're looking for. You're welcome.)

Up this weekend: Three games in Yankee Stadium.

On Friday night, it's budding Yankee killer Adam Loewen vs. former Oriole and current championship ring-lackin', crossword puzzle-doin' twit Mike Mussina.

On Saturday afternoon, everyone's co-Least Favorite Oriole, Steve Trachsel, will face New York's soon-to-be Least Favorite Yankee, Kei Igawa.

And on Sunday afternoon, Erik Bedard will hope to rebound from his middling performance in Minnesota against some dude named Darrell Rasner. Fingers crossed that we're not 0-6 for Tuesday's home opener.